turkey dinner.

he was returning my phone call. we talked for a long time. it was really good to catch up with him. and as i was thinking that he says to me "i should have knocked you up while i had the chance."
at first i am a little too confused to speak. but i manage to come back.
"ummm. hon, what do you mean 'while you had the chance?' we've never had sex. in fact, we've never even dated. i don't know how you would have planned on doing that."
"dixie cup and a turkey baster, my dear. dixie cup and a turkey baster."

god, miletus. you're really sick sometimes, you know that?

obviously in crisis...

a close girlfriend just asked me if i thought it was ok for her to sleep with her horrible ex-boyfriend again.
now, i am not a supporter of the back-slide. my take has always been only moving forward, no looking back.
but she asks me this and i say to her, in all sincerity, "hon, you can do what ever you want. i am not here to tell you how to live your life, only to support your disillusionment. so you go for it. repeatedly. i fully support you abandoning all reality."
i mean...what kind of friend says that? we are obviously both in crisis...

you would have loved him too

i thought this was really beautiful:
you would have loved him too.

light and sweet

i have to wonder, by the end of my lifetime, how many people will know exactly how i take my coffee...

alcohol and oxygen don't mix.

i am currently in a time of transition. i moved out of the time share in williamsburg and until i get the keys for the compound in bed-stuy i am staying with my boyfriend and his roomate/ex-girlfriend in crown heights. it is not as weird as it sounds.
except last night we all got really drunk in the living room, playing jenga. smoking cigarettes. we killed a couple bottles of wine and a good portion of a bottle of gin.
how the snoot made it to work today is beyond me.
i waddled out of bed around noon today and stood there looking at the wreckage. it was bad. cigarettes every where. empty bottles. toppled jenga tower. dirty glasses. but the part that puzzled me the most was the presence of a camera. a camera?
the last thing i remember is a falling jenga tower and then i was waking up naked in the bedroom.
after a certain amount of party the last thing you want is photographic evidence.
later in the afternoon, after wandering fuzzy headed and aimlessly with ms. roomie through manhattan we settled down at an outdoor cafe for a glass of dog hair.
after a few sips i managed to get out "was someone taking pictures last night?". she told me what she remembered.
i really hope those photos don't come out.

vanity fair...again...

it was at the art fair that she saw the gigantic orb displaying one very magnified eye. as they walked by it she tried to explain to him the brief phenomenom of the lover's eye. where miniature portraits were painted of a single eye to be given to a lover. where only a lover would know someone so intimately to identify them from just a portrait of their eye.
she finished her explanation as he turned to her.
taking both of her hands he swayed, only slightly...she knew he was wasted.
he swayed. tried to steady himself and looked in her eyes. took both of her hands and said "you are totally my lover."
maybe that meant that he had seen her eyes. she could have thought about it more. but she looked up. beyond him. to the backdrop of his profession of love and saw only the life size paintings of maniac clowns decapitating people with chain saws.
was it a sign?
she leaned forward and kissed him.

the serenity prayer

i think it would be really amazing if more people in my life used it as a basic guideline in their day to day existence. i feel like it would decrease the number of doomsday phone calls i get on a weekly basis.