anxiety dreams

in the past couple of weeks i've been having a lot of nightmares and anxiety dreams. last night was really no exception, and i won't get into the details of the bad parts really...
there were lots of parts of this dream that sucked...two car crashes...involving people i knew, burn victims, grossness. but there was also a really awkward and beautiful part. for some reason dan and i had reconciled and i was at the dabbs motel out in llano with him and a group of mutual friends. and then we fought and we were stuck there and he went to bed and i was going to go sleep in another room but realized that there weren't any other rooms so i went in to move my stuff and he woke up and said i could sleep there. so i fell asleep next to him and dreamed that i was a super hero...ice girl. and my super power was that i could turn myself into ice..i don't know what that was going to do for me. and i was in love with super man. and it's winter in michigan. possibly detroit? and we are by the water. and we're arguing. and i realize that it's pointless to argue, that he is never going to see my way. and i jump into the water and i turn to ice. initially i sink to the bottom, but as i float back up to the surface, still beneath the water kind of, floating down the river, i realize that he has jumped in after me, and has his arm around me, and is swimming us down stream, trying to keep me above water so i can breathe. and i fall asleep in his arms in the water, and i have my arm around him, and i can feel the muscles in his back moving as he moves his arm for every stroke...and then i wake up kind of...in my dream, and i am in bed with my arm around dan, and still half asleep i think for a minute that i can feel the muscles in his back moving, like he's trying to save me.

not that i need saving. just that the feeling was nice.

the dream goes on. but that was the beautiful part.

and at one point i also tasted a really interesting cold cut. also in michigan.