the past couple of days i have noticed an ingrown hair near the hairline of my bush. this morning, as michael and i were lying in bed i brought it up, saying i wanted to attack it with a needle or a pair of tweezers. michael says "you can prolly just squeeze it out by now...judging by the looks of it."
y'all, i squeezed this fucker. it was no ingrown hair. it was my fucking unborn twin laying dormant in my bush for the past 30 years. it was completely insane. i held it in my hand. jaw dropped. we haven't decided what to name it, but i tell you i must have lost 2.5 lbs.
we said a little prayer and i shed a little tear before i threw it into the wastebasket by the bed.
good bye little friend.
maybe my pants will fit better now.
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